The Real Winners of The World Cup

It's been a week since the World Cup officially finished, but the celebrations and heartache are still here.

Firstly, let me be honest with you all - I can't really stand watching soccer.
I mean I'll happily be patriotic once every four years and watch with hope that Timmy will answer a nations prayers and do us proud, but if it's not Australia on the pitch I can barely watch 10, let alone 90 minutes of the game.
I can appreciate the skills of Neymar, Messi and Schweinsteiger. I can also understand the craziness of Cahill's strike, and the exquisite goal saving dives from Tim Howard. But despite this, I'd rather watch the Red Viper's death scene from Game of Thrones on repeat, than watch sportsmen play and act for free kicks.

Despite my criticism of the game, I must say that I found myself get caught up in the enormity of the World Cup, but maybe for different reasons than most.

Lets kick it off with the main reason most guys get up at ridiculous hours to watch this - the women.
Yes, this tournament is meant to be about the players, their skill, and the goals, but most men are more interested in the wives and girlfriends that fame can get you.
The entire German team are apparently dating 10's, both Messi and Neymar are batting well above their average, and some fan even got herself a modelling contract just for being seen in the crowd!

German hero 'Super' Mario Gotze and his stunning trophy.
Being held by his even more stunning girlfriend.

Germany's Top Model winner, and girlfriend to
German player Khedira. She definitely makes
the Germans an ever greater team.

Lionel Messi is scoring goals in all the right places!

Axelle Despiegelaere stole the entire tournament with her few seconds of
fame during a German match, earning herself a modelling contract.
Well played indeed.

It wasn't only the women in the crowd that impressed us.
Every country has their loyal fans. Some get painted in their team colours, others dress up in some weird and whacky outfits that make you question almost everything you've ever known. This year there was one Colombian fan who outdid anyone else.

Let me introduce you to the Colombian Nazi Weed Pope.

Where on earth did this man get this idea. Swastika, cannabis and the Pope. Instantly I'm imagining an alternate reality where Jesus and Hitler are sharing a bong. It's possibly the strangest thing I've ever seen. And let's not forget his less courageous friend. These two are my favourite thing to come out of this World Cup! 

But the crowd's weren't the only reason to watch, there was of course waiting for someone to have a momentous stuff-up that would cost their team everything. This year though it was an entire team that broke the hearts of the host nation. As the Brazilian team and supporters tried to come to grips with their 7-1 defeat the internet and twitter highlighted some amazing reactions.

Brazil's Christ the Redeemer statue looked a little different following the loss.

The new Brazilian flag was also unveiled on twitter...

Finally, one of the main reasons I dislike soccer is the acting. So many players would look more comfortable on the 3metre spring board at the upcoming Commonwealth Games than on the field at the World Cup.

There were plenty of nominees for the best dive of the tournament, but the award had to go Arjen Robben this year. His amazing display caught the eye of the referee, and scored a 9.4 from all judges, with top marks given for difficulty and technique. He also almost broke the long jump world record with this effort.

Luis Suarez was a very close second, with his argument that Italian defender Chiellini 'shouldered his teeth' following his well publicised 'three-thirty-itis' hunger issues.

Well done to all the real winners of the World Cup, I'll look forward to the camera-men finding the best looking women in the crowd again in four years time. Until then I guess the French countryside will have to do as we turn our late night and early morning attention to watching Le Tour!